Battlememories
by Ragnelle
Summary: Memories of battles, told in first person. Features mostly Húrin. Not sure about rating: there are no inapropriate language or graphic descriptions of violence but themes can be dark. Chapter 3 slightly eddited.
1. Thangorodrim

**A/N**: "Battlememories" is part of a seies of shorter pieces. I have also one for LotR, but they will be posted seperate in the section for LotR. Most entries will probably feature Húrin Thalion, but other charaters will probably appear. Updates will come as the muse strikes, but each part will stand on its own.  
Reviews are much apriciated.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own anything that you recognize - that is all the invention of J.R.R. Tolkien

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_Last of all Húrin stood alone. Then he cast aside his shield, and wielded an axe two-handed; and it is sung that the axe smoked in the black blood of the troll-guard of Gothmog until it withered, and each time that he slew Húrin cried ' _Aurë entuluva! _Day shall come again!' Seventy times he uttered that cry; but they took him at last alive, by the command of Morgoth, for the Orcs grappled him with their hands, which clung to him still though he hewed off their arms; and ever their numbers were renewed, untill at last he fell buried beneath them. Then Gothmog bound him and dragged him to Angband with mockery.  
__Thus ended Nirnaeth Arnoediad, as the sun went down beyond the sea. Night fell in Hithlum, and there came a great storm of wind out of the West. _(The Silmarillion, Of the Fifth Battle: Nirnaeth Arnoediad) 

_'Turgon, Turgon, remeber the Fen of Serech! O Turgon, will you not hear in your hidden halls?' But there was no sound save the wind in the dry grasses. 'Even so they hissed in Serech at the sunset,' Húrin said; ans as he spoke the sun went behind he Mountains of Shadow, and a darkness fell about him, and the wind ceased, and there was silence in the waste. _(The Silmarillion, Of the Ruin of Doriath)

**Hurin speaks**

**_Thangorodrim._**

I remember the wind. The wind that hissed in the grass.

A silent sound. A peaceful sound. A fragile sound. Fragile - because peace is so easily broken, and silence can be destroyed by a single word.

It is strange that of all the sounds that day I remember this; the wind that hissed in the grass. The wind at the Fen of Serech that day when the sun set and all our hopes came to naught because the day had not yet come. Darkness fell upon us, and we were defeated by our own strength. They betrayed us. And I remember the wind in the grass at sunset when all other noises fell silent and Time stood still.

I saw my brother fall and I alone was left alive, for all that had not escaped were dead. And I remember the wind.

I could not even hear my own cries and I knew as I slew that my words were without meaning for Night came, Night when all things disappear, and the day I called for I would not see. I saw the fire that burnt in my enemies' eyes, and it was dark as the blood from my brother's eye. But still I screamed my defiance because my brother was dead! and I would soon follow him, for I saw no escape. And I remember the wind that hissed in the grass at Serech before the laughter of the Orcs and the cries of Angbald drowned the silence and Time returned.

Darkness fell.

No day has come for me. I am bound in darkness and I can not flee the power of the Enemy. I see my son. I can not reach him. I see my daughter. I can not help. My bonds will not break. My hopes are shattered. All strength has left me and I see no escape. I can only wait. Wait while all I once loved are lost and all I once honoured are gone. Wait until all memories fade and nothing is left of what I once knew.

But I remember the wind. The wind that hissed in the grass at Serech before the sun set.


	2. Tol in Gaurhoth

**A/N**: This memory is slightly AU. The inspiration comes form the quote in the begining, but it does not describe the battle quite as _The Silmarillion_ tells it.  
I am not quite sure when I will update next, I am trying to do one for Niennor, but so far she eludes me. I have also made contact with someone that was willing to beta for me, but we have not quite started yet, so I might make changes to the already posted chapters later. However, I wanted to get this out now, so it is un-betaed for now. Which makes reviews even more apriciated ;-)  
I've also made some small alterations to the chapter since I posted it.

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_In that hour Lúthien came, and s__tanding upon the bridge that led to Sauron's isle she sang a song that no walls of stone could hinder. Beren heard, and he thought that he dreamed; for the stars shone above him, and in the threes nightingales were singing. (…)_

_But Lúthien heard his answering voice, and she sang then a song of greater power. The wolves howled, and the isle trembled. Sauron stood in the high tower, wrapped in his black thought; but he smiled hearing her voice, for he knew that it was the daughter of Melian. _(The Silmarillion, Of Beren and Lúthien)

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**Tol-in-Gaurhoth**

"I call to you. I call you out; out from your dark vaults I call you. Answer! Come, and meet me here before the gates of your tower. You know me, and I know that you desire me. Come, then! Come, and we will sing. We will sing, you and I; not with each other but against each other, and you shall know that my song is the stronger.

Come out!

I shall sing you above the earth and under the earth and on the earth. I shall sing ice in your eyes and a fire in your flesh. Your mouth shall turn blue, and the flames devour you from the inside, for you know where the one I seek are. You hold the key to my beloved's chains .

Come, accursed one!

It is I that call you; the daughter of Thingol calls you out and the child of Melian shall defeat you."

He came, the lackey of Morgoth. Sauron came, and his power was great. He towered above me and I knew that if his song should be the stronger, I would never again see my mother and my father. And Beren...

No!

We sang. Back and forth we sang and I had never known a song more potent.

I sang of life; he sang of death,  
I sang of growth; he of decay  
I sang of the spring; he sang of a barren fall,  
I sang of Light; he of Shadow.

In my song were the light in my father's hall where no shadow lingers.  
In his song was the darkness behind the stars before the world began.  
His song sang of the dark beneath the earth where all light dies;  
In it I heard Beren cry…

I sang, and my song sang of the trees underneath the stars that hour we first met, and in it I heard the nightingale sing.

Tinuviel

"I see you. I see you now. I know you. Exposed and reviled; what are you, shadow, other than fear of light?"


	3. Silent

**A/N**: Sorry about the long lapse, other writings have taken my time, but I also used some time working on this one. Reviews will, as always, be most welcome.  
I've made some minor alterations, trying to polish it up a bit more, something I might do from time to time to all chapters.  
For clarity's sake: itallics are speech.

_Disclaimer_: see first entry. Some dialog is taken or closly paraphrased from _The Silmarillion_; anything you recognize is Tolkien's not mine.

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**Silent.**

_Day will come again. _

They had laughed at my bold outcry, deeming the words empty, and I, I who would defy any foe, I who would give my life to keep the secret safe, was dragged though the mud as night fell. Helpless.

Then: pain. Then: humiliation. Then the slow torment and dark temptations came. _T__ell me__. Tell me, and be free._ But I stayed silent. Fearless.

I had seen beauty. I had seen light. And I, I who was named Steadfast, saw light fall and my son betrayed. And I stayed silent. Hopeless.

_Go. I pity my fallen foe._

No pity does the dark one know, no day did come to my aged bones. But the freedom of my limbs I took, and went. And I stayed silent. Joyless.

Then: suspicion. Then: mistrust. Then the bitter knowledge and the accusations came. _He must have fallen, or he'd not been free._ And I went silent. Friendless.

I remember beauty. I remember light. And so I went to where the Eagles fly to look toward that place of light, and all was silent. Then in despair I cried:

_Turgon! Turgon!__ Turgon, w__ill you not remember__? W__ill you not hear, Turgon, in you hidden halls_?

But all was silent. Lightless.

Then: darkness. Then: despair. Then the long, hapless road and the anger came. And I walked silent. Friendless.

No pity for the broken man, no pity for his widowed wife. Alone I found her by the darkened stone.

_They are lost.  
__But you are not.  
__You __are too late; I will go with the sun.  
__I came as I could, t__he __road was long.  
__How did she find him? Do you know?_

And I stayed silent. Joyless.

No more beauty. No more light. And so I went to where the coward people live while she laid dead, unburied, on that hapless site, and all my pain I laid on them until they broke. And I left them scattered. Hopeless.

Then: anger. Then: rage. Then the thirst for vengeance and the mindless fury came. And I walked lonesome. Fearless.

They brought me to the caves, before the Elfking's throne. And I, who was named Steadfast, I, who was the silent, threw my accusations at his feet. And he was silent. Pitying.

There fell the shells from my eyes and light entered the darkness of my mind. Truth I saw in the Lady's eyes and in her words I knew Morgoth's lies. And I stood silent. Helpless.

No day, no new dawn for me. But in the cool, clear after-light of mid-day battle I saw the ruins of my life with silent mind. I bowed, and left. Empty-handed I sought what end I migth. I had lost all, but was no more a thrall.


End file.
